In Nigeria today, you don’t need to have money to be a financial guru. In fact, the best “finance bros” are broke — but in a focused, motivational, Forbes 30-under-30 way.
They don’t own land, but they own vision. They don’t have savings, but they have a solid Twitter thread on “10 Ways to Build Wealth in Your 20s.” Deep stuff.
So, in case you’re ready to join the league of wallet-lite, ego-heavy money mentors, this is your guide to becoming a full-time Finance Bro… without actually touching real money.
Talk Big on LinkedIn Every Single Day.
Start your day with a post that begins with: “At 4am this morning, I made N0.00 in passive income but gained clarity on financial freedom.”
Use phrases like “wealth architecture,” “strategic income pipelines,” and “cash flow mastery” ; even if your actual cash flow is nothing to write home about.
End every post with: #FinanceMindset #MoneyMoves #SecureTheBag
Make Reels
There’s no Finance Bro without personal branding. Start filming finance advice videos in front of your window because PHCN is on break.
Begin every video with: “Yo guys! What if I told you your 9–5 is holding you back from financial freedom?”
Meanwhile, you’re still using your company’s WiFi and borrowed an office to shoot the video.
Use Terms Like “Portfolio” and “Diversification” Recklessly
Even if all you have is ₦3,500 in your account, you must tell people your “portfolio is diversified.” This simply means you have;
- ₦1,000 in Flutterwave stocks you bought by mistake
- ₦2,000 inside one sports betting app
- ₦500 remaining in your Fusion wallet
You’re still diversified, bro. Even Dangote started somewhere.
Download Canva and Create Carousels of Wisdom
Every finance bro must feed the gram.
Make carousels with titles like: “5 Money Mistakes to Avoid in Your 20s, Why You’re Still Broke (Even Though You Earn 50K), Passive Income Ideas That Work While You Sleep (But You Still Wake Up Hungry)”
The design must slap even if your account balance doesn’t.
Get Invited to Speak at Events
Getting invited to speak at events (whether free or paid) is how you establish “authority.”
Go on stage and say: “When I was 18, I decided I’d never be poor again.”
Meanwhile, you’re now 28 and you’re still poor. But now you have followers.
Don’t forget to talk about “generational wealth” with the confidence of someone who hasn’t paid rent since 2021.
Start Every Podcast Episode With ‘This Is Not Financial Advice’
Starting every podcast with this disclaimer is quite important because you know you’re winging it.
But still drop lines like: “If your money isn’t working for you, you’re doing 2025 wrong,”
“Crypto isn’t dead, your mindset is.”
Even though your own crypto is currently in coma.
Use American Accent or Your Best Lekki-British Blended English
Whether you schooled in Ogba or Oshodi, talk like your parents raised you in Silicon Valley.
“So basically, right, when you look at the metrics, passive income allows you to 10x your lifestyle…”
Nobody will question you. You said “10x,” and that’s all we needed to hear.
Wear Blazers in Hot Weather
There’s just something about sweating in a blazer while explaining “compound interest” that makes people take you seriously. Bonus points if you’re on Instagram Live while doing it.
Looking broke but sounding rich is an art form.
Being a Finance Bro in Nigeria is not always about how much money you have, it’s about how well you package your wisdom.
So, have fun wearing your blazer and posting your thread. And remember broke is temporary but vibes? Vibes are forever.
Join Fusion and Start Investing
And if all else fails, take your own advice and start investing. That 5k you kept aside for vibes, invest in forex using Fusion and in no time, you’ll be rolling in ROI.
Join Fusion today and begin investing with what you have, right where you are and thank me later.
430 Responses
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