So, you’ve decided it’s time to leave the sapa and shege behind and seek greener pastures. But there’s just one small problem: your account balance is giving “stay where you are.” Fear not!
We’ve compiled the ultimate survival guide to fund your japa plans. Note: Follow these tips at your own risk; we’re not responsible if EFCC puts your name on their vision board for 2025.
1. Slide into Your Sugar Daddy/Mummy’s DMs
The hustle is real, and love (abi na lust we go call am) is one of the hustles! Find yourself a generous benefactor who is willing to invest in your dreams. Keep the romance alive by calling them “Zaddy” or “Sweet Mama of life.” Bonus points if they’re already passport holders of the country you’re escaping to—no visa fees! Just remember, as with all investments, there are returns expected. Ahem.
RELATED: How To Find A Sugar Daddy in 2024
2. Start Ajo: Collect Number One and Run!
Organize an ajo (thrift contribution) with your friends and family. Volunteer to be the first to collect. After receiving your share, book your flight and activate your ghost mode. Don’t forget to change your number and delete your WhatsApp before departure. If EFCC releases a “wanted list,” kindly keep my name out of your mess.
3. Crowdfund Your Dreams with GoFundMe
Nothing says “help me escape” like a heartfelt GoFundMe page. Title it something emotional like “Help Nkechi Flee the Shege.” Don’t forget to add: “Any little contribution will go a long way!” Nigerians love a good sob story, so play your cards right, and the funds will pour in faster than your tears during fuel scarcity.
4. Become a Crypto Trader (and Pray for the Best)
Tell everyone, “I’m into blockchain technology,” even if you can’t spell it. Spend a few weeks on YouTube learning how to trade crypto, then throw your life savings into a token. If the gods of Bitcoin smile on you, you’ll be out of this country in no time. If not, well… there’s always sugar daddy/mummy (see point 1).
5. Fake It Till You Make It
Who said you need to fund your japa plans the legit way? Get yourself a travel plug who can hook you up with a fake job offer, bank statement, and everything else you need for a visa application. After all, a wise person once said, “If you can’t dazzle them with brilliance, bamboozle them with paperwork.” Just don’t forget to look shocked when immigration officers ask why your “employer” has never heard of you.
The road to japa is paved with creativity, resilience, and sometimes questionable decision-making. Whether you’re collecting ajo money or sliding into a sugar daddy’s heart, remember that all is fair in love and migration.
May the japa gods smile on you, and may your flight never be delayed. Safe travels!
If you need more ‘legit’ insights on Japa plans, options and opportunities, join the Japa Community on Fusion today!
4,249 Responses
pharmacie en ligne: meilleures pharmacies en ligne françaises – acheter médicaments en ligne livraison rapide
Thank you for sharing superb informations. Your web-site is very cool. I’m impressed by the details that you have on this website. It reveals how nicely you understand this subject. Bookmarked this web page, will come back for more articles. You, my friend, ROCK! I found just the info I already searched everywhere and just could not come across. What a perfect web site.
http://sceglifarmacia.com/# miglior farmacia online con sconti
I and my pals appeared to be checking out the nice guides located on your site then quickly I had a horrible feeling I had not thanked the website owner for those secrets. All the ladies appeared to be as a consequence joyful to read through all of them and have in effect definitely been using them. I appreciate you for turning out to be simply helpful and for selecting varieties of exceptional resources millions of individuals are really wanting to discover. My personal honest regret for not expressing gratitude to sooner.
zuverlässige Online-Apotheken online Apotheke Deutschland günstige Medikamente online
precios bajos en medicamentos online: precios bajos en medicamentos online – Tu Farmacia Top
http://pharmaclassement.com/# medicaments generiques en ligne pas cher
Can I just say what a relief to find someone who actually knows what theyre talking about on the internet. You definitely know how to bring an issue to light and make it important. More people need to read this and understand this side of the story. I cant believe youre not more popular because you definitely have the gift.
Fantastic web site. Plenty of useful information here. I am sending it to a few pals ans additionally sharing in delicious. And certainly, thanks for your sweat!
farmacia con cupones descuento: ranking de farmacias online – ranking de farmacias online
meilleures pharmacies en ligne françaises codes promo pharmacie web codes promo pharmacie web
Great website you have here but I was wanting to know if you knew of any user discussion forums that cover the same topics talked about here? I’d really like to be a part of group where I can get opinions from other knowledgeable people that share the same interest. If you have any recommendations, please let me know. Appreciate it!
farmacie senza ricetta online: top farmacia online – farmacia online
precios bajos en medicamentos online: farmacia online – farmacia con cupones descuento
beste online Apotheken Bewertung beste online Apotheken Bewertung Apotheke Testsieger
Whats up very cool site!! Guy .. Beautiful .. Wonderful .. I’ll bookmark your web site and take the feeds alsoKI’m glad to seek out a lot of helpful information right here in the put up, we’d like develop extra strategies on this regard, thank you for sharing. . . . . .
https://apothekenradar.com/# apotheke online bestellen
I haven’t checked in here for some time as I thought it was getting boring, but the last few posts are good quality so I guess I’ll add you back to my everyday bloglist. You deserve it my friend 🙂
Apotheke Testsieger: Apotheke Testsieger – Apotheke Testsieger
meilleures pharmacies en ligne françaises: Pharma Classement – pharmacie en ligne France
Superb post however , I was wanting to know if you could write a litte more on this topic? I’d be very thankful if you could elaborate a little bit further. Many thanks!
top farmacia online: comprare medicinali online senza ricetta – miglior farmacia online con sconti
This is a topic close to my heart cheers, where are your contact details though?
https://tufarmaciatop.com/# mejores farmacias en linea
PharmaClassement Pharma Classement Pharma Classement
Female Virginity: God may be omnipresent, but He still needs a good Wi-Fi signal to check your DMs. — Alan Nafzger https://bit.ly/3XgeTRG
https://tufarmaciatop.shop/# comprar medicamentos online sin receta
https://sceglifarmacia.shop/# farmacie senza ricetta online
Apotheken Radar: Medikamente ohne Rezept online bestellen – Preisvergleich Online-Apotheken Deutschland
beste online Apotheken Bewertung: Rabattcode für Internetapotheke – ApothekenRadar
Female Virginity: The “celestial conundrum” is the riddle of why we were made this way if it’s a sin to be this way. — Alan Nafzger https://bit.ly/3XgeTRG
liste pharmacies en ligne fiables: pharmacie en ligne France – médicaments génériques en ligne pas cher
comprare medicinali online senza ricetta farmacie senza ricetta online Scegli Farmacia
Female Virginity: The difference between a sin and a “mistake” is about three good excuses and a convincing sob story. — Alan Nafzger https://bit.ly/3XgeTRG
very good submit, i actually love this website, carry on it
Great tremendous things here. I am very happy to look your article. Thanks so much and i am looking ahead to contact you. Will you kindly drop me a e-mail?
ApothekenRadar: Generika online kaufen Deutschland – Medikamente ohne Rezept online bestellen
Having read this I thought it was very informative. I appreciate you taking the time and effort to put this article together. I once again find myself spending way to much time both reading and commenting. But so what, it was still worth it!
Thanks , I’ve recently been looking for info about this topic for a while and yours is the best I’ve discovered so far. However, what concerning the bottom line? Are you sure in regards to the supply?
Pharma Classement: liste pharmacies en ligne fiables – médicaments sans ordonnance en ligne
Hi, I think your website might be having browser compatibility issues. When I look at your website in Safari, it looks fine but when opening in Internet Explorer, it has some overlapping. I just wanted to give you a quick heads up! Other then that, great blog!
mejores farmacias en línea: comprar medicamentos online sin receta – Tu Farmacia Top
farmacia online comprar medicamentos online sin receta Tu Farmacia Top
http://sceglifarmacia.com/# classifica farmacie online
https://pharmaclassement.com/# meilleures pharmacies en ligne françaises
hello there and thank you for your information – I have definitely picked up something new from right here. I did however expertise a few technical issues using this web site, as I experienced to reload the website many times previous to I could get it to load properly. I had been wondering if your web host is OK? Not that I am complaining, but sluggish loading instances times will sometimes affect your placement in google and can damage your quality score if ads and marketing with Adwords. Well I am adding this RSS to my e-mail and could look out for much more of your respective intriguing content. Ensure that you update this again very soon..
http://apothekenradar.com/# online Apotheke Deutschland
Heya i am for the first time here. I found this board and I to find It really useful & it helped me out a lot. I hope to offer one thing back and aid others such as you aided me.
liste pharmacies en ligne fiables: acheter médicaments en ligne livraison rapide – médicaments sans ordonnance en ligne
farmacias sin receta en España: comprar medicamentos online sin receta – farmacia con cupones descuento